When I found out I was pregnant I started using TheBump.com, which is a website I used to get helpful tips, it's where I set up our Baby Website (http://koenig-reidbaby.ourbabychannel.com/ if you wanna check it out) and just tells you interesting things like the approximate size of baby. Anyway, I was on the site today just checkin' things out and they sent me a notice saying "Only 126 days left!" which got me thinking... a lot....
Lately, I have not been sleeping too well at night. I wake up nervous and worried that we won't have everything ready for baby before he gets here, or that something could go wrong, or the family drama will be worse.... ugh... my mind just races at night for some reason. Last night I woke up around 4:30am and came down stairs because I just couldn't shake the fact I'm 22 weeks pregnant, meaning only 18 weeks until our son makes his appearance... then I started thinking "Omg, my friend went into labor 8 weeks early... what if that happens to me and we aren't prepared? what if I go into labor at my shower? what if... what if... what if!!!"
I know, I know... I've been told SOOO many times "It's totally normal as a first time mom to be nervous," But I just feel like I'm missing something if that makes sense.
The other thing I've been freaking out about is, even after baby is born, what do you do once you get home? I have never cared for an infant before, EVER. I've only held a baby once, I've never changed a diaper, made a bottle or anything like that ...Gah...
Needless to say I'm getting more and more nervous and feeling less and less prepared for our son to come. But then there is this other side of me where I'm so excited for him to be here, and I'm so excited to be able to hold him and cuddle with him. Justin and I have already talked about all these things we're going to do with him next year, so I already know it is going to be a great year.
I guess it's just "first time mom jitters" like everyone says... It's just hard to shake, and feel confident!